sweet surrender

summer sun has warmed these bones, back to autumn we return. and the unthinkable has happened, you are gone for good this time. i cannot look back, i will not look back. i loved you with a passion that consumed me until there was only you. how does anyone get to that point? which fool would allow that? surely not me! and yet i clung, and i clung, and i clung. i did not wish to hear of it, that love could die. how could love die? does anything not die? but then this must mean something, that i am free, it must mean something.

yes, it means that there is a greater love, and i will cling to that if i must cling onto something. i am finally free, like a slave released from the dungeons of an ancient ship, battered, bruised but free, and the warm sunlight hurts my eyes, i refuse to look. what is this? leave me amongst the ancients, i have battled and rowed this ship for five years, what is another seventy-two? i look in the mirror, my eyes shine no more, my dreams pound against my chest, what is another seventy-two? i will not stay a second longer. this greater love, it carries me on, it says lie still, it says rest, it says peace be with you, it says you are now safe, it says trust, it says all these beautiful things that are so difficult to understand, and the most perplexing, you are my beloved. and i surrender.