"baby's black balloon makes her fly..."

on sunday, i was at a workshop (vocation discernment tools) and to keep awake, i started doodling in my notebook. it started with your normal average garden, which suddenly started spouting balloon plants (the "flowers" were balloons and the "leaves" were ribbons), one of which was then given by a boy to his lover, who then floated into the sky together, further boosted skywards by a whole bunch of balloons which had gathered below their feet. the doodling took on a life of its own to create a whole balloon planet whose occupants had wandered towards other parts of the universe. for example, there was a man (holding on to a bunch of balloons) walking his dog on, i don't know, jupiter? and of course, you can't leave out saturn because it has so much character (my favourite planet!). on one of its rings, a lone young man (holding on to a bunch of balloons) sits pondering, watching his planet far below him. a young lady (holding a bunch of balloons) hangs on to a star, which does not burn in her hands. a couch potato (with balloons tied to his couch) floats across the sky watching the best show of his life. as these ideas flowed out of my pen, i grew to love it more and more and decided that it would be my first paint "masterpiece".

the next day, i got to work. after having meticulously transfered my doodle onto the nervous new sheet of paper, i began my quest to become the next monet. not that i'm a huge fan of water colours but that's what papa got me so i was determined to kick some water colour ass! since monday, painting has taken on a whole new meaning for me. and i don't think i would have experienced this if i had not started with water colours. you see, painting with water colours (lets call it WC, haha) is really tedious. if its too watery, you smudge other parts. you can't paint your background first because it would be hard to paint things on top of it. because of that, you have to be so so careful when painting around all your people and balloons and trees and boats and whatever during the background stage. and then there's the issue of painting the little things. like the little people or the little ribbons (leaves of the balloon flowers) or the doggie's little face and for something so small and perhaps insignificant to an observer, it sure takes your utmost concentration. which was an experience of awe and wonder for me. it made me ponder the conception and creation of my very own existence.

i mean, like me, i'm sure you might sometimes look into the sky or at the sea and be blown away by the vastness and immensity of this universe and for that moment be throughly overwhelmed by the smallness of your being. how out there, here, in this universe, you must be nothing but a mere speck of dust (from dust we come and to dust we shall return). all these feelings that drench you, all these moments that create the life you live, all these words you say, all those thoughts, all these attempts to survive, to find meaning, to discover truth, to fight for what you love and believe in...how small they all must seem!

but why don't you try painting small people in WC? why don't you try painting little ribbons attached to strings attached to balloons in WC? and then, instead of despairing or belittling the smallness of your being, you will be overwhelmed by it instead! because sweeping a crimson-stained brush across a sunset sky is NOTHING compared to painting the whiskers on a little doggie. marvel at the precision and care that was taken for you be created exactly the way you are, whether you are a shireen or a joyce or a nash or a reno (if you see your name here, it's probably a result of divine inspiration or erm, sporadic thought!) of course, do not then scoff at sunsets and seas and stars and saturn! let the colours, the vastness and the brilliance sweep you off your feet. wonder at how they're never the same each moment and yet beautiful all the same.

well, now that pravin is back from new zealand, he's introduced me to the world of acrylics and of course, put an end to my delusions of being some kind of artistic prodigy! while painting now seems more daunting than ever, especially in the presence of someone worthy of the title, "artist", it's also really refreshing to learn about the variety of colours, strokes and techniques one can use with just a few tubes of paints and a couple of brushes. rather impressive even! i can't wait to wake up in the morning and try it all out! i didn't just now because when i started, the sheet fell of the easel and toppled the cup of water which spilled all over the floor which sent me into a panicked frenzy to save my painting and the floor! haha. also a sign to stop because i was really tired and pravin had just said before that, that painting while you are tired subconciously makes you bo chap (can't be bothered) and can be seen in your painting. painting, though releasing and random, is indeed a deliberate and intense process. the story of creation.

if you've succeeded getting to this part of the post, you sure won't regret it. here's why. i mentioned at the start of this post that i had been doodling this picture on sunday, and to add on, during the sleepiest parts of a sunday afternoon. now, today i'm scanning the papers, and i read about this catholic priest from brazil who, to raise funds, tied himself to a humongous bunch of helium-filled balloons and flew up, up , up into the sky to beat his previous record of flying with 600 balloons. the priest is now LOST!!! here's a scary fact, the priest flew up into the sky on sunday, the same day i had the mad inspiration to draw a pageful of people flying across the sky hanging on to balloons!! i didn't know whether to laugh or cry reading this article. this priest had actually shown that this crazy dream of mine was possible and not trivial enough to not be attempted (i'm sure others must have tried this but i haven't come across their stories yet). i really do hope that he is safe and does get found though! you can read about it here.

p.s. a select few will be privy to the finished piece and if it's GOOD, you guys MAY get to see it here. =P
p.s.2. go to flickr.com, search "balloons" and be blown away!
p.s.3. i finally figured out a way to stop kings of convenience from always receiving the spotlight on this blog!!! enjoy the songs. will add more soon.